<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Unfair by Ulqueleh (Ulquii)</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26938606">Unfair</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ulquii/pseuds/Ulqueleh'>Ulqueleh (Ulquii)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>It hurts to love you [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Voltron: Legendary Defender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst and Feels, Crying, Drunken Confessions, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Unrequited Keith/Shiro (Voltron) - Freeform, Unrequited Love, matt holt is a good friend</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 16:42:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>658</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26938606</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ulquii/pseuds/Ulqueleh</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“I thought you had gotten over it.” </p><p>He didn’t want it to come out as an accusation, because he didn’t have to feel guilty for that, but his shoulders tensed. </p><p>“Everyone would think it,” he responded bitterly, as if he was included.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Keith/Shiro (Voltron), Shiro/Curtis (Voltron), Shiro/Man (Voltron)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>It hurts to love you [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1965667</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Unfair</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Part 1 of the series, yay!</p><p>Buckle up for some angst!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“And if I can't see it?
</span></p><p>
  <span>He paused, his hand already holding open the door to go, but hearing his voice like that, so doubtful and weak, made him hesitate. He looked over his shoulder, finding him still on the couch he had helped him lay down on, but now he was seating, with his head hanging low from his shoulders, staring at the floor. He looked tiny, fragile, a look he hasn’t seen on him ever since their Garrison’s days a few years ago, and he was surprised that the new constant strength on his shoulders and expression had vanished.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” he murmured, for a second not recalling what he had said before to have that question as reply, but seeing him shake his head and rub his eyes made him remember.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t do it, Matt,” he said, cradling his head between his hands and fisting his hair, “I can’t see it. It’s too painful.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He closed the door, crossing the living room, and he stopped in front of him, hoping he could at least look up to him.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought  you had gotten over it.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t want it to come out as an accusation, because he didn’t have to feel guilty for that, but his shoulders tensed.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Everyone would think it,” he responded bitterly, as if he was included.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He sighed and took a seat beside him, palming his head and wondering if that little could console him.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s been years feeling this way, Matt,” he whispered, breath hitched, “At first I knew it was just a delusion, because he was with Adam and there was no way he would look at me.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He knew that. He was there during that time, when he saw him with stars in the eyes and an immature affection brightening his face. He was there when things ended with Adam and his attention went completely to him, in a way that only feed his desire of something more than a friendship. And he was there when the delusion transformed into hope, so he understood it easily.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>And he knew too that the sentiment will only grow stronger, because it was impossible for him to live without the intensity that characterized him.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“But out there...” he continued, his hand passing across his face, “In space, everything was so different. It was as if I could reach him. As if I could finally take his hand, make him turn to me and then he’d realize he could love me. Because there was no way I would hurt him, that I would condition him or abandon him or dare to forget him.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Keith...”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“He’s so important to me, Matt,” he ignored him, but he didn’t pull away when he circled his shoulders with his arm and took one of his hands, the other fisted and rubbing the tears falling from his eyes, “I can’t see my future without him. I can’t see myself without him by my side.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He knew it was the alcohol talking; there was no way he would let himself be seen so fragile and hurt being sober —not by him, in any case— but what had happened that night had affected them both. He could even say that it had affected every single one of their friends, in different quantities and qualities. But the shock was the same; a declaration of love, a proposal, a golden ring that shouldn’t be in that hand.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t, Matt,” he sobbed, falling down into his arms, “I can’t do it.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He hugged him, letting him sob out everything that he had to put up with during the party, during the months Shiro had been dating that man from his crew, Curtis. He wrapped him with his arms and borrowed his shoulder to cry on, tightening his hold around him every time his voice cracked, every time his cries hitched.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Because it wasn’t fair. And everyone knew it, except for Shiro.</span>
  
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This story is part of the <a href="https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject">LLF Comment Project</a> (including the <a href="https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/commentbuilder">LLF Comment Builder</a>), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates responses, including:</p><ul>
<li>Short comments</li>
<li>Long comments</li>
<li>Questions</li>
<li>Constructive criticism</li>
<li>“&lt;3” as extra kudos</li>
<li>Reader-reader interaction</li>
</ul><p>This author replies to comments.</p><p>If you don’t want a reply, for any reason (sometimes I feel shy when I’m reading and not up to starting a conversation, for example), feel free to sign your comment with “whisper” and I will appreciate it but not respond!</p><p>~</p><p>Come and yell with me on <a href="https://twitter.com/ulqueleh">Twitter</a>!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>